Co-dependency to maturity in five easy steps
I posted this on here for your comments. It ran in the paper a little over a year ago, and I find it funny to read today.
By Patrick Rice – Assistant Online Editor
As Published in The Auburn Plainsman on October 25, 2001
It’s a fact college students face the daily danger of drugs, alcohol and unprotected sex. Everywhere you turn, there is sex, violence, lying, slander and other forms of unpleasantness.
But thankfully, at this University, some of our incoming students could care less. Why? Because they don’t have to worry about these problems, as they have parents to make their decisions for them.
What is the answer to this problem?
Answer E: None of the above.
I’m talking about our first-semester freshmen. These people have it made all the way through high school doing nothing, why not go all the way?
For the first 18 years of their lives, they didn’t have to worry about making any choices at all. They had wonderful, loving and caring parents to live their lives for them.
They had ample time to plan ahead for the more important things in life, like figuring out how to join the Wednesday Night Drinking Club, what their Rho Chi group was going to be like and SEC football.
Think of it this way: Sometimes in a textbook you’re told to do a homework assignment by a teacher and he may say to do Chapter 2, Unit 4.
Well this is Unit No. 1. The philosophy of today’s incoming freshmen is that this is still high school, just with bigger and better parties.
However, many in our freshmen class, while having the time of their lives now, will discover what college is come December when grades come out and they notice their parents can no longer make their decisions for them.
To aid this problem, here are five steps that every college freshman should know by now.
5 steps to success
1) High school is over! Auburn University is unlike high school in that the philosophy from high school is very democratic: Everyone in our modern society is given access to a high school education.
But the university is an inherently elitist institution. You are only here because you met a demanding set of criteria, and you will only remain here if you work hard and continue to meet an increasingly demanding set of criteria.
Word to the wise: Work now to play later.
2) You must work! Abandon the idea that you’re “entitled” to a certain grade in a course because of the amount of work that you put in (many students bring this idea with them from high school).
If it takes you 20 hours to perform a certain task, and someone else does the same task with the same results in 5 hours, you will both receive the same grade. Just like in the real world, what matters at the university is not effort, but results.
3) Take at least 12 hours! If you allow yourself to fall behind, you simply may never catch up. I know too many freshmen who are no longer full-time students because they dropped classes.
College is a blast, but the sooner you get out in the world, the better. If this applies to you, plan on freshmen classification again next year.
4) Don’t fail your core classes! Regardless of your major, remember that your core courses are the essential part of your education.
It doesn’t matter how good your high school teachers thought you were; they only had time to give you a very superficial introduction to the basics of science, history, literature and art that are essential to becoming an educated member of our society.
Get your core classes out of the way early to focus on your major. Do this to have more time for the better things in life, like Wednesday Night Drinking Club and SEC football.
5) My ID is a credit card? More than ever before, freshmen walk around town using their Tiger Card, and who is picking up the bill?
Mom and Dad, so what’s the problem? The problem is decision making is one of, if not the most important, skills a child can learn (and must learn, if he or she is to become a successful adult).
If you haven’t already maxed out your Tiger Card, learn to spend what you have. It’s a great habit that will come in handy for the long run.
If any of this applies to you, please consider it carefully. Auburn University is one of the finest schools in the south, and it is that way because of the people who go here.
Let’s keep that tradition alive and you a part of it.
Patrick and 
Patrick 10:11 pm on November 11, 2002 Permalink |
Man, the more and more I read this, the funnier it gets.
Part of me asks, “What was I thinking?” and the other part is going, “Were you drunk?” :drunk:
Patrick 12:15 pm on February 20, 2003 Permalink |
Dr. L, my Great Books II professor, just told me that she and the rest of her department have been using this as the topic of the final English Comp II agree or disagree paper.
First off, I feel honored that one of my arguementive writings might influence or persuade anyone. Second off, I’m going to laugh at myself for writing this every time I read this (as stated above).
Lastly, everytime I do read this I do still believe strongly in everything I’ve written in this writing, this was sort of my Freshman Manifesto; as to if you should agree or disagree with me, that’s your final essay to write, not mine.
Vee 10:53 pm on May 9, 2003 Permalink |
so true so true… I also go to good old AU and I spent my freshman and a good part of my sophomore year thinking that I was too good to study despite the fact that my GPA was telling me otherwise. You think I would have learned, and I thought I did. At the beginning of each semester I told myself “hey self, this is the semester you’re going to straighten up”, which is exactly what I keep telling myself I’m going to do for the upcoming Fall. I would do it this summer, except I will be using that to pay off, not my tiger card, but a collection of credit cards that I have collected over the last 2.5 years. Wanna help?